So it's the first day of 2019. First of all how in the hell are we already here?! I feel the last year has been a whirlwind of an adventure. I guess that's the life of a mother right? Our days pass quickly and in a fog and we often wonder how in the hell we got through a day alive and kept our children breathing. So here's to another 365 days of whirlwind chaos. CHEERS TO US MOMS!
So...What does the new year ahead mean? Let's take a look? Well first, if you're like most people and on social media you know over the next day you're feed is going to be flooded with everyone saying "See ya 2018! Here's to 2019 and a new me!"..."Peace out 2018 you were great, but I'm glad you're over!"..."It's a New Year and a New Me!" and so on, and so on. We all know it's true. Everyone is posting pics of themselves saying good bye to the crazy year they've had and hello to a new year and 365 fresh new days to screw up. Okay, okay just kidding. Well sort of. Now don't get me wrong, this is all fine and great, hey I've done it too. I've had years where I've sworn up and down that I was going to be a new and improved me, I've made New Years resolutions of losing weight, accomplishing goals, and being the ME I've always wanted to be. We've all done it. But here's the thing. It lasts only so long right? We're all gung-ho about it as the new year starts, but then we all most often fall into old habits. We are all eager and excited, but then as we fall back into our every day routines we get right back into the daily grind and those resolutions fall to the wayside. It's hard to break these habits. Especially as Moms with our little hellions of children running around. So today I want to discuss this with you. I am in no way against making New Year's resolutions, or better yet, New Year's promises to ourselves that we're going to work each day on bettering ourselves and our lives. That's really what it's all about right. But, I am also a realist. I'll be your biggest cheerleader, but I also know that life often throws us crazy curve balls all the time. So Let's look at how we can refocus our lives back on ourselves, make promises to ourselves that we can keep in this crazy world of motherhood.
So let's take a minute to be real. As Mother's and Women in today's world we always get caught up in the lives of our children, our career, our home life, and our significant others. We run around to get our children to school, to sports practices and events, after school activities, or to friends houses. We have to work our daily jobs, do laundry, grocery shop, pay bills, clean the house, and oh let's not forget feed our children 3 meals a day and endless snacks. How in the world are we supposed to have time for ourselves or keep New Year's Resolutions if we barely have time to eat? So let's take a minute to look at this...to break it down. Now don't think with my venting that I don't enjoy being a mother, I love being a mom to my two crazies and wouldn't change it for the world, but we all know life as a mother is chaotic and we all enjoy a venting session every now and then. However, If we want to make goals for ourselves we also have to be honest with ourselves and it has to be planned out and scheduled. I've learned this over time. Now before you make excuses, I'm going to be brutally honest, I don't want to hear it. This is because I know. I just explained it above. For example...if your child came to you and said he has a project he's been putting off and it has to be done in the next few days you'd carve out time to get it done with him and help him right? Yes you would...so why don't you do that for yourself. Why do you make excuses when it comes to what you want or need. Stop right now!
So today I'm going to give you tips, that have worked for me. These are tried and true. Write these down, take them, and implement them because YOU deserve to accomplish your goals. YOU deserve to have time for yourself to refocus on you and feeling the BEST DAMN version of yourself. You know why? Because your kids and your family deserve that. You can't be the best for them if you're not the best for yourself. So here goes.
1. Write down your goals and DREAMS: Yes I mean it. Sit down with a pen and paper and write down the goals and dreams you have for yourself. Yes DREAMS...because if you don't set big dreams for yourself (those dreams that make you feel sick to your stomach) girl your not going to be accomplishing big things in your life. Goals and dreams are different. Goals are things you have step by step plans to accomplish and are often within reason. But dreams...dreams are BIG, CRAZY, and SCARY. They are what makes you feel sick because you think they're not possible. But they are when you break them down into goals that are attainable steps. So write both!
2. Let your family know about your goals and dreams: Share your dreams. Share them, share them, share them. Put them out there into the world. Post them on your refrigerator or your desk. LOOK at them and READ them every day. Put them out there into the world of social media. Pray about them. When you put your goals out there into the universe they are more apt to come true.
3. Make a Plan: Strategize, plan, and make a schedule. It's great to have goals for yourself, but you can't just "wing it". That never works and it's why many times your goals aren't achieved. Sit down and make a plan. Schedule out your day and find those times in your day that you can work towards your goals. Even if it's 5 to 10 minute pockets.
4. Communicate: This is big. I mean BIG. Communicate your plans with your significant other. Talk to them and tell them how you're scheduling time within your day to work towards your goals. Figure this out together. If you're not in a relationship but live with a roommate communicate with them about your plans. It doesn't matter who it is, but make sure you share with someone else. This holds you more accountable.
5. Schedule time with yourself: Yes make a schedule. Sit down with your planner and schedule "appointments" with yourself to work towards your goals and DON'T cancel them. You wouldn't cancel an appointment to get your hair done so don't cancel on yourself when you're working to achieve your dreams and goals. These appointments are for any part of your plan you've created. If your goal is to lose weight, schedule an appointment for your workout. If your goal is a business plan to start a new business schedule time to work on it, to make phone calls, to send emails. Whatever it is put it in your schedule.
6. Find others working towards the same goals: When you're working on your goals and dreams with others that are like minded your chances of achieving those goals are higher. When we feel accountable to others we are less likely to give up on ourselves because we don't want to disappoint others. Find a group of friends or family, or a group on social media working towards the same goals. Join and connect with them and keep each other accountable to your daily schedule and tasks.
7. Make a Vision Board: Vision boards are a great way to keep your goals in the forefront. You can make vision boards by cutting out pictures and gluing them together as a collage, or you could make a collage on your computer and print it out. Whichever works best for you. Put it up somewhere you can look at it each day and remind yourself of what you're working towards. As you accomplish your goals check them off. This also provides you with the sense of accomplishment for all your hard work.
8. Personal Development: This is a critical part of reaching your goals. Reading or listening to personal development helps your mind stay focused on your goals and keep your outlook positive. There are many wonderful books out there as well as podcasts that you can take 10 minutes a day to invest in. A positive mindset helps get you through the days that may not go as planned.
9. Grace: When we try to change old habits and routines it's not easy. It can take up to 3 weeks to break old habits and create new ones. When we start off wanting to work on new goals we are excited, eager, and ready to attack. However, when things don't happen instantaneously or we hit bumps on the journey that eagerness starts to fade and we often give up or slack off. Give yourself grace in those moments. Allow yourself those moments of frustration, but then keep pushing.
10. HAVE FUN! : Might sound simple right? Well we often are so hard on ourselves, especially when trying to accomplish something new we have our heart and minds set on. We can be our biggest critics, but we should truthfully be our biggest cheerleaders. Enjoy your journey, it's YOURS and you make it all it is. Celebrate each success. Yell it from the rooftops. Enjoy each milestone.
Think about it. As mothers when our children accomplish something new such as rolling over, sitting up, talking, crawling, walking...remembering their first nursery rhyme, reading their first book, writing their name...we CELEBRATE it. We post it on social media, take videos, call our family and friends. We do everything short of hiring a plane to fly a banner across the sky. Why do we stop this? Why do we not celebrate our own milestones, accomplishments, and success. I'll tell you. We're afraid of what others will think or what they'll say. It's okay for someone else to celebrate our success right? It's okay for someone else to share it. But when we want to share it about ourselves we stop. We question it. We second guess it. DON'T! Celebrate yourself. Share. Tell others. Don't think that you're being self centered, self involved, cocky, conceited, or narcissistic. It's OKAY to be proud of yourself. You always do it for your children and others, now celebrate yourself!
So Momma's let's go into 2019 knowing that things are hard...hell sometimes they suck...but give yourself grace as you go through this year working on YOUR goals and dreams. Don't give up. Find other Momma's to confide in, work alongside, and lean on as you CRUSH this year Mommin and Bossin. Set out a plan, laugh, live, and love hard. Enjoy every moment of your journey through 2019 and handle it. You've Got this!
Much Love!
xoxo
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